The whole story’s not the half of it. Am I as happy as Larry, am I as rich as Richard?. Here it comes. 21. I must be doing something wrong. I can’t believe what they said to me. “...
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1. 21 2. A Downside To The Upstairs It was a fine idea in autumn. On the palest afternoons. Parallelograms of sunshine fell across the room. I woke up and it was winter. With the rain across the roofs. And the weather turned me into a b...3. A Great Parker I’ve got nothing on today. Which is not to say I’m naked. I’m just sans plans. Maybe you could come over. God knows I’m going nowhere fast. Since you asked. Whenever you wa...4. A Hiccup In Your Happiness The start is the hardest part. To step inside and announce a newly broken heart. And Louise, you’re ill at ease. You bite your thumb and tug your skirt below your knees. And it hurts even more...5. A Sobering Thought (just When One Was Needed) Sunlight seeps beneath the bedroom door. The new day can no longer be denied. You’re puzzled by the puddles on the floor. It’s time that I came clean about last night. I got a phone call...6. Abdication! It’s only too clear. And I know you hate to state the obvious. But the houses round here. Hold jumble sales and joblessness. I always thought autumn was my favourite time of the year. But I gue...7. Adolescent Song Of Mindless Devotion I love you from the heart of my bottom. I love you from the bottom of my soul. I love the soles on your feet. I love you from the foot of the hill. (I promise I will). I'd sail the driest desert....8. After The After Party Even the most familiar face. Can disappear without a trace. Amidst a crowd of theatregoers. I had been waiting for a while. My stare mistaken for a smile. Till I found the person. No-one knows as well...9. All The Recipes I've Ever Ruined This apartment is falling apart. And I can't figure out where to start setting things right. It's been the worst part of a year. Since you turned a cartwheel in here. And said your goodbyes....10. Andrew’s Pleasure Andrew’s pleasure is a beautiful girlfriend. They both wear sunglasses and hide their faces. Andrew’s pleasure is a beautiful girlfriend. Who isn't scared to kiss him in public plac...11. Aviatrix One of these days. She’ll buy an old suitcase. And she’ll throw a few things together. Give her godspeed. She says “the sooner I leave the better”. And any day now. That jo...12. Beach Boys Medley For five months he was dry. Feb til July. But he found a little song. Wrapped up in a dream. Gave some thought to the rhymes. Put a little work into the chorus line. But it was really just a dream. Ju...13. Beer Nut All the streets look the same ’til I’m fumbling for change. Light on the porch like we had arranged. Home street home, it cheers me. Pat my pockets for the key. The boys and I have been...14. Before The Sun Came Up I’ll never forget the morning we went running around. Before the sun came up. So new to this town. Under the weary light we took a ferry ride. And went over to the island. Stood there silently...15. Birthday Present For Katrina Happy birthday dear Katrina. We hope you have a lovely day. Your father and I are oh so proud. In fact there’s something he’d like to say. We’ve watched you grow from a beautiful...16. Broken Bones So much for unexpected weather. It's been overcast forever. Since I fell from my sweetheart's clutches. To a springtime spent on crutches. Coffee cups, promises, sure. But I've never br...17. Camera Shy Here’s me in 1981. Squinting into a sinking sun. Ankle-deep in the Pacific. In the foreground are my friends. Grinning madly at the lens. They look heliolithic. Again in 1993. A Polaroid you to...18. Can't Believe My Eyes You always want to be somewhere. Looks like we’re already there. Take a look outside. I can’t believe my eyes. Sunset became the sunrise. I can feel your heart beating. Anxious, you offe...19. Caravanna Here are we, with a view of mountains. Staring at the floor for hours on end. There’s a world outside that window. And we’re looking at linoleum instead. Another sunset passes us by. We...20. Cat In Sunshine You tell me you don't like the way I comb my hair. But there are two of us at this table. Only one of us doesn't care. You're so engrossed in what you read. And you're not really t...21. Clever Hans We’re a pantomime horse. There’s a stupid suit where our relationship was. And we’re stuck inside, we’re stuck inside. There’s nowhere to gallop and there’s n...22. Columns O' Steam Your dad’s proud face is glowing. He recommends we buy goggles and flags. All aboard and don’t forget your bags. Let’s leave this place behind. And I didn’t get you a prese...23. Danielle Steel She’d look beautiful in a tea towel. But she’s dressed up to the nines. She’s covered herself in make-up. But she can’t make up her mind. She’s a damsel in distress....24. Day In The City Tram ride through the city. Got my backpack on my lap. Got all the cars driving round like crazy. Got no plans cos I’m feeling lazy. Nice day in the city. My friend stops by on his bike. I ask...25. Detective Agency I was supposed to wait for you. But we’ll have to wait and see. Have I been stood up?. Standing for an hour or two. By the detective agency. I wish the walls weren’t powder blue. And I b...26. Don't Bring Your Work To Bed Driven by ambition. Do know, my love, you're missing. All the splendours, all the wonders. All the days I have squandered. Thoughts of you to guide me. Forever here beside me. All these hours ben...27. Don't Come With Me I’ll make you wait around. For all these things to be sent off. If you’re with me. I’ll traipse you round this town. I’ve got so many things to take care of. Time goes slow...28. Edward, Sandwich Hand God he hates the early mornings. And the Monday afternoons. He’s already looking bored. He’s already looking forward. To Friday evening with his friends. It couldn’t come too soon...29. English Murder Mystery I love her but she loves Agatha Christie. And she’s so wrapped up in the English Murder Mystery. I was nowhere near the scene of the crime. I was nowhere around at the time. Someone dropped ars...30. Even Stevens I won’t lie. I don’t like you whispering that way. It’s your turn. It’s your turn of phrase that gives you away. The games we play. One to you in the afternoon. And one to...31. Fear Of Rollercoasters At the arse-end of another century. I spend hours in the cemetery. On my way to anywhere but here. It was perfect in the summertime. I'd just ask and the sun would shine. But the days just disapp...32. Fiction Written down here, gentle reader. It seems too good to be true. But there’s a girl in Kansas City. With my favourite tattoo. Oh why would I lie to you?. This was in another century. Somewhere n...33. First Cousin I don't know the difference between you and the weather. You covered me in dust and wet me through. Felt a little nervous when we two were together. Because you were like a storm that I could tal...34. Fridge Magnet Song It’s funny I feel like I felt before. Late at night on the kitchen floor. Staring at the wonderful words on the fridge. Wondering what you meant by your message. It’s funny I havenȁ...35. Friendless Summer Today of all days you decided. That you’d drop in uninvited. You were ever so excited. You were never so in love. And this time it’s requited. If I looked less than delighted. I was tryi...36. Frisbee Today the sun is shining and I feel a million dollars. And I don’t need reminding that I own eleven cents. The winter of my discount tent when we first met each other. Became the summer of the...37. From Here To Maternity This is the last month. A childhood disappears. She may look young for her age. But she is brave beyond her years. With the weight of the world on her shoulders. And the weight of a child inside. And...38. From Macaulay Station I know by now. That no-one cheers up when told to. That it’s more the arms that hold you. Than whatever words are said. Of course I know. But you can’t blame me for trying. I could hardl...39. Goodness Gracious What a beautiful day for a crushing defeat. What a stupid waste of sunshine. A funeral pace down a favourite street. But I have to come home sometime, I suppose. Don’t be hopeful on my behalf....40. Great Lengths Remember that New Year’s Eve. We were frightened by a firework?. You could not believe the fuss I made. I should have laughed it off. I should have left it lying. I did not receive much sympath...41. Guess How Much I Love You Good Friday and I’m miles away. And missing you already. From a backyard in Balmain. To the post office and back again. I bought a postcard. I’m getting close. But I haven’t got a...42. Harmonicas And Trams On a tree-lined route. Looking out on wasteland. Treated to a one-man show on a tram. Just harmonica. No peripherals, no band. Just harmonica, just a man. In another time. You were reaching for my han...43. Honey Honey Honey Honey, honey, honey, let's slow down. I'm only new in town. I'm nasty and unshaven. Maybe it's about time that I said. Baby we should go to bed. I'm tired of misbehavin'....44. Housewarming If you find yourself a house. Will you invite me around. For a bottle of wine. And a chat about old times?. Don’t move too far away. But if you do I’ll come and stay. And keep you up all...45. How To Tie A Tie Not for the first time. I'm having second thoughts. In the days we used to shoplift. I was always getting caught. But we were penniless. And penitence was more than I could afford. For the last t...46. I Am About To Sail I’m going to sea. Don’t try to reason with me. I’ve never wanted anything so much before. And I’ve wanted this so much. Since so long ago. So I’m going to sea. If yo...47. I Can't Believe It's Not Better Take your time. Or some of mine. I’ve got more than I know what to do with. It’s getting boring. At the wrong end of the morning. Staring myself stupid. Into a turned-off television. Cro...48. I Don't Want To Walk Around Alone No More I don’t want to walk around alone no more. In sleepytown, no fun no more. It’s silent till the breeze strips bark from the trees. I don’t want to lie tonight in bed alone. Or ligh...49. I Don't Want To Walk Around No More I don’t want to walk around alone no more. In sleepytown, no fun no more. It’s silent till the breeze strips bark from the trees. I don’t want to lie tonight in bed alone. Or ligh...50. I Prefer The Twentieth Century I’m not typically one to rush to judgement. But I’m having difficulty dealing with adjustment. I suppose that I’ll get used to it eventually. But so far I prefer the twentieth cen...51. Ie, Eg, Etc Here comes the blow-in again. Blowing kisses from the doorway. Don’t just stand there, let him in. We want to hear some of his stories. We’re the people that he knows. When there’...52. If You Lived Here, You'd Be Home Now Towards the limit of maps. The roads surrender to empty spaces. The roofline seems to collapse into the evening. I was asleep on the passenger’s side. White as a ghost against a floodlit billbo...53. Jennifer Jason I had a dream about Jennifer Jason Leigh. I was running and she was chasing me. Sometimes she looks amazingly beautiful...54. Jewel Thieves We are happy-go-lucky Johnny-come-latelys. Millionaire beach boys in ten-cent shirts. And our pictures are in all the papers. We stole a stone, for what it’s worth. We are jewel thieves. But we...55. Little Athletics I don’t know when it started. But it’s worse now than before. We could both be broken hearted. It’s so hard to be sure. But what are boyfriends for?. We went from perfect stranger...56. Little Distraction It's a lonely, lonely, lonely night. It's a lonely, lonely, lonely night. I need a little distraction to come along. A little distraction, and you're the one. It's a lonely, lonely...57. Macintyre Far from handsome. Close to ugly. I pull my pants on. I don’t look lovely. I wear a singlet underneath my shirt. I tuck it in at all times. And as the plot gets thicker. The hair on top gets th...58. Mars Hi there dear, I’m on Mars again. Keeping in touch with all my friends. I found a nice place. Why don’t you come and visit?. It’s not as red as you’d think. From looking at...59. Mezzanine I could sense the static. Must have been the season. Climbed into the attic. Looking for the reason. She came up to find me. Saw me in the rafters. Just stood there behind me. Asked what I was after....60. Midweek Midmorning You were never one for sleeping late. But oh! the working week can wait. We ought to spend today together. You might be less than overjoyed. Unimpressed and unemployed. But I refuse to waste this weat...61. Motorscooter I’ll put this place behind me soon. For somewhere bright and shiny and new. These streets got smaller the more I grew. It might be trite but it’s true. I’m walking home in the ear...62. Moving Press your fingers against the strings. This is where the song begins. Pinch a hair from the tip of your tongue. Close your eyes and fill your lungs. Here is where her neck begins. Feel the blood insi...63. Music To Hold Hands To You can't keep a secret. But you keep a diary anyway. And you get away with murder. Because you've got a way with words. Yeah, and I know where you keep it:. Under where your underwear is me...64. Myopic Friends When we look back on it. We can’t deny our love affair was so short-sighted:. You go this way, I’ll go that, Our paths will cross again someday. It’s funny how things always work...65. Now I'm Even Further Away Alone tonight. I’d rather be by your side. As I drift out to sea. I think I should be in another place. Closer to the lips on your face. But now I’m even further away. Now I’m eve...66. Off With His Cardigan! If I’ve told him once I’ve told him a thousand times. But he refuses to listen. He’s the perpetrator of some hideous crimes. He’s a hopeless fashion victim. I’m less...67. Only Angels Have Wings Heavens above, I could never hate her. She’s done nothing wrong. A photograph of Rita Hayworth. A Latin bombshell, an atom bomb. Lovely Rita, America’s sweetheart. The girl next door and...68. Paper Planes The letters she wrote all day long. She never showed them to anyone. Is there someone in there. Who could show her how to have some fun again?. Her friends were never going to pretend. She fell in. Tr...69. Pin Cushion I’m not sure what I should say. Your closest friends are far away. But you know that I live locally. And you can pin your hopes on me. You’re not sure how you feel about him. I guess you...70. Please Respond By the time you read this. I’ll be anywhere but here. I really can’t believe it’s only been a year. I’m trying to tell you how I’m feeling. I hate all this so much....71. Punchlines I must admit I find it funny. But I might have known she’d find it dumb. The air hostess and the blow-up dummy. I’m in stitches and she’s twiddling her thumbs. She hasn’t l...72. Putt Putt We’ve done thousands of things together. Feels like we’ve been friends forever. But there’s on thing I know you’ve never done. The time has come. I don’t care about...73. Putting It Off And Putting It Off Oh, you’d think I would have learned by now. But no — I make the same mistake somehow. Time and time again. I’ve been doing it for days. Putting it off and putting it off. Iȁ...74. Remote Control Twenty-five year old teenager steals every scene. He's got wrinkles in his forehead. He's supposed to be younger than me. He's a rebel with a clause. His contracts guaranteed. He’...75. Rue Something Three AM: three dozen or so friends we’d met hours ago. Filled a bar to capacity. You’d learned school French for a year. Ordered 36 beers. We all cheered your audacity. Asleep on the cu...76. Run Spot Run Accidents will happen. Catastrophes will occur. One hour in your kitchen is boring enough. You locked me in for twenty-four. Catastrophes can happen. Accidents will occur. I was looking for a way to g...77. Scottsdale I walk right past his window when the light is growing dim. He looks away from me and as I glance in at him. He owns one bed, one bookcase and the television. He sits and watches and I’m glad I...78. Self-preservation Breakfast, sat on a Japanese mattress. Getting this happy takes practice. The world would be duller without us. Blacklist anyone who tries to attack this. They can say what they like but the fact is....79. Shine On Me If it’s not raining you can see right down the hill from my friend’s window. To the church at the foot of the council flats that I pass when I walk home. And here I am with time on my ha...80. Silver Friends I never thought that it could happen quite so strictly. But strictly speaking we were usually speaking strictly. I returned her library books. And she returned my dirty looks. The hardest thing I ...81. Sleep Well We shook hands and parted ways. The sun danced on his eyes. Financial matters were cast aside. I’ll sleep well tonight. I had to leave this place behind. See some colour for the first time in m...82. Smokers In Love In the early morning, when you wake each other up. Coughing like you might not make the afternoon. You keep the curtains closed and you carry off a conversation. But you both know that it’s sti...83. Snug Tuck your head below my breast. I will not love you any less. Give your bravest face a rest. And grate your grief out on my dress. Lower you down next to me lover. I’ll wrap you in my cotton sk...84. Southernmost Weekends away:. These were the happiest days. Ill with the thrill of the chase. They’d take a train. Take off Friday for the coast. In summer they’d go southernmost. Where the sky was sw...85. Stayaway Stars Yeah, you’re upset. So am I, so am I. I sometimes forget just how seldom you cry. And thus how much I hate it when you do. Yeah, you’re a mess, more or less. So am I. I sometimes forget...86. Sucesslessness You're not yourself. Darling, you appear a little dog-eared. You've got yourself to blame. And you do. So assure me you're OK. But you said that yesterday. One day we'll be poor no...87. Summertown I’ll drop you a postcard, I’ll pick up my pen. Miranda Street’s deserted, it’s winter again. Give me ten minutes and I’ll paint you a picture. Of holiday houses wher...88. Sunlight In A Jar We’ve never been much chop at all that sensual stuff. One of us always seems to stop before the other’s had enough. Like a self-help manual that’s been written in Braille. It seem...89. Synchronised Sinking You don't need to ask me twice. I'm not averse to giving advice. On a barstool basis. Four o'clock sounds fine to me. I'll meet you at the library. There's privacy in public p...90. T-shirt Weather Hey Mike, you busy?. All this sunshine’s making me dizzy. Went outside, all my clothes dried. And if I’m babbling, please forgive me. But it’s the first hint of sunshine. For a we...91. Take This Lying Down I was looking for something. To soothe your aching head. Where did I put the recipe for breakfast in bed?. Three days stright, drinking late. Sleeping on the fire escape. And in that nightie –...92. Tale Of Two Cities You and I have got a postpak relationship. It's a tale of two cities. I don't know how many self addressed envelopes. Have passed between you and I and Melbourne and Sydney. Two weeks '...93. The Art Of Cooking For Two One of us is packing things in boxes. The other two are trying to pretend. That the boy she loves is not all that obnoxious. We’re hoping that she’ll see sense in the end. But I’v...94. The Baker’s Wife He says he loves her, he’s her husband. He says “I do” but he doesn’t. He tells lies by the dozen. And sometimes she feels like sticking her head. In the bread oven. Here c...95. The Cassingle Revival Another summer slipped away without me noticing. At least you had the decency to say “I’ll see you later”. The streets are wider here. I watched you disappear. Such a simple thing...96. The Chapter In Your Life Entitled San Francisco Is it April yet?. I forget sometimes how slowly summer passes. You disappeared into Departures. Only half a year ago. It seems like so much more, you know. I went a fortnight without so much as an ema...97. The Drunkest Man In The World The drunkest man in the world. Misunderstands what he’s overheard. Morose one minute, more toasts the next. He’s amazing, he’s a mess. Nevertheless. Always well dressed. The drunk...98. The Fog Of Trujilla On the moon tonight, here on our own. You and I, we are the only ones in town. Can’t set up a retirement plan, can’t set up a ceiling fan. But things are starting to turn, things are sta...99. The Fog Of Trujillo On the moon tonight, here on our own. You and I, we are the only ones in town. Can’t set up a retirement plan, can’t set up a ceiling fan. But things are starting to turn, things are sta...100. The Forgetting Of Wisdom A summer's day at my disposal. By way of apology, a proposal. I really should have realised I was wrong, wrong, wrong. Such a long, long, long time ago. It hasn't been all beer and skittles....101. The Golden Age Of Aviation For argument’s sake let’s pretend we could stop arguing. Over which of us is wrong and why it isn’t you. We’re barely awake before your head’s up in the clouds again...102. The Great Dividing Range There's a blanket on a mattress on my sister's floor. There's a bookmark in the atlas that I left you. I know we've been as far apart as this before. But take a look at what we&apo...103. The Invention Of Ordinary Everyday Things When my friend comes over. We sit on the sofa. And most of our clothes are other people’s. With hairstyles the same as. The rich and the famous. We’re certainly no strangers. To pins and...104. The Music Next Door A week went by, and then another. And not a word from you. I remember when a day would be unusual. I saw the spring become the summer. As the spring is wont to do. And I began to find the boredom almo...105. The Opposite Of Coffee She gets a haircut every June. On a kitchen chair. Last year it couldn’t come too soon. Now she couldn’t care. Her mind is otherwise occupied. She sits cross-legged on the floor. In an A...106. The Perfect Crime The sun is on the hilltop. Casting shadows on things below. The afternoon has left the valley cold. I raise my eyebrows and grip the dashboard. You take the bends like you built the road. This is the...107. The Sandringham Line She’s given it some thought. And it’s giving her some grief. Could it be she’s bored beyond belief?. By the time she says goodbye. She’s looking somewhere else. Stifling a...108. The Shipwreck Coast Clouds and clifftops close. Grey like all the ghosts. It’s cold on the shipwreck coast this morning. You’re looking for Lorne. A coat to keep you warm. A scarf to keep me from noticing y...109. The Tichborne Claimant Big and fat, here he comes. All his fingers look like thumbs. Mother dearest, look who’s here. It’s your long-lost loving son. Brush aside your fears. Look: he’s got his uncle...110. The Winter Proper It was dark when you got home. And only getting darker. The garden overgrown. It was further than you thought. From the driveway to the door. You fumbled for the porchlight. And somehow you were sure....111. The Year Of Driving Langourously Darling roll the window down. I can't breathe. And I want to feel the northerly down my sleeve. I love a sunburnt elbow pointing to the sea. And, darling, can't you find us something on the...112. There Is A Boy That Never Goes Out Put the radiator on – it’s freezing. I’m coming over later on this evening. And leave the television off. At least until the conversation’s run its course. “Ba-ba-ba...113. Thomas And Martha Dorchester, August 1856. I’m an old man now and ashamed of this. But I had to be in town for other reasons. I stood in a crowd of three or four thousand. The hood on her head and the rope aroun...114. Tmrw Vs Y'day When it’s hot the whole town goes to the swimming pool. When it’s not the whole town stays inside. Walk past the war memorial. Towards the water slide. And on your left. Is all that ...115. To Absent Votes They’re packing up the polling booths. And pulling down the posters. As the sun sets on the primary school. And the streetlights flicker on. Across the town your mother left behind. At a bitter...116. Train Robbers' Wives Every second Saturday it’s off to Wormwood Scrubs. To sit within six inches of the man she loves. The visit’s twenty minutes. But it’s a whole day on the bus. Presses her fingers...117. Transpontine Anchors away!. Granted one last summer's day. We watched the sunset silhouette the western suburbs. Across the bay. And when the sky was monochrome. We drained our drinks and headed home. Past br...118. Tree Every now and then everything comes up roses. But you know me and all I know is. Right from day one our days were numbered. But you kicked up a storm when I stole your thunder. We’re twisted to...119. Twenty-two A funny old birthday. I’ve talked to no-one. Is she counting her loose change. At the edge of the ocean?. It’s a while since we’ve spoken. I want her to phone me. I’m a lit...120. Two Storeys Downstairs it’s dark most of the time. And it’s a mess. The air is stale with the smell of wine. And cigarettes. She says she’ll clean it up sometime. But she forgets. She paints...121. Umbrella Katy’s on the telephone. With her collar up and her defences down. I smell like brandy and it’s starting to rain. She says the line is bad, she says “Speak up Dad”. But she...122. Under The Rotunda It’s already Friday. And soon it’ll be Friday night. And if you’ve got something planned. I suppose I’ll understand. But give me half an hour. And I’ll meet you in t...123. Untidy Towns First things first: I have a happy secret. The next bit’s worse. I intend to keep it that way. I can’t remember the last word spoken. I got some mail I didn’t open. It’s an...124. Up I’ve made some plans. But it’s all up in the air. I made some sandwiches. And I got myself a garden chair. And forty-five balloons. One sunny afternoon. I suppose it’s not surpris...125. Victor Trumper I am bowling to Victor Trumper. And the sun is shining. And my shirt is white. This is the best day of my life. I am bowling to Victor Trumper. And he shrugs his shoulders. And I’m gone for six...126. Weatherboard It was summer when she moved in. And it was winter when she moved out again. And the sky was usually blue. And the single bed was big enough for two. It's funny the things that stay with you. Her...127. Welcome Home Her letter said in three weeks. She’ll be coming down from Sydney. And if it wasn’t asking too much. Could she spend a few days with me. But it’s miserable this time of year. Don&...128. What Passes For Silence She knows how pathetic it looks. She’s read it in books. And seen it in strangers. Eyes on the fickle spring skies. Awaiting the moment eveything changes. Unsure what to hope for when it does....129. What You'll Miss In the morning it felt like the world had stopped. And clenched like a giant fist up tight. But then you noticed the dust still dropped. And danced through the bedroom window light. It’s the wo...130. William And Mary Dear Mary, a letter from the grave. You’d better well behave. Don’t spend more than you save. Be careful not to. It’s scary - I hope you’re sitting down. I know how this mu...131. World Encyclopedia Of Twentieth Century Murder Around here the roofs are redder. And the houses are closer together. But the people are further apart. And it doesn’t ever really get dark. I bury myself in books. I’m very good at murd...132. Wyoming I like the look of Wyoming. Although I wasn’t there for long. And I like the sound of Wyoming. ‘Cause it sounds like the name of a song. The sky was big and the fields were wide. And if...133. Young And Dumb The last time I saw you. My guitar had just been stolen out the back of a car. And you were showing The Hemlock the scars of your recent break-up. We went searching all over town. Turned the city upsi...
