So important to my heart. Never lie to myself. So important to my life. Never stop being alive. Unconcerned about my future. Never will i look ahead. Unconcerned about my past. Never look back with a...
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1. A Prayer For My Soul 2. A World Without End Ive acquired a taste for money. Ive acquired a taste of speed. And I dont think my life is giving me everything I need. The artificial light. The artificial sun. Burning in my eyes makes me feel like...3. Admit It Its so elementary to the way things are. Theres alot to be learned. Theres so much in my head. Teaching all the world what they dont want to know. Theres a reason to burn. Theres is a reason to be dea...4. All In All We are running a world with a crocked smile. With our heads in our legs, waering guilty smiles. We all have a reason to feel our sins. But were never quite sure where the goodness ends. We are all in...5. All The Right Words Do you possess the ability to train your thoughts. On a bad description of your failing concepts?. There is another world inside your mind. Where the dreams are real and the truth is blind. Enjoy your...6. Anti-Communication I had a talk with god yesterday he said to me. He told me man was above all animals. Because while eating his pizza and beer. Man can communicate, communicate. Me and god. Were such god friends. We ta...7. Blood On Your Hands I will begin with your own definition of sin:. There is no god as you described himand. You are only an icon in an expensive church. Where priests lust for eight year old altar boys. Have people forgo...8. Brave New Psychosis I thougt it was enough just to be alive. I thought it was enough just to be extreme. But the filter of reality is gone from my eyes. My sanity is shattered and my fear is destroyed. My life has become...9. Brought To The Whip Ive lost the will. Ive lost everything. Id give my life up. For one small sparkle of hope. All this torture. All this greed. Ive lost my soul to gain the perfect sin. Ive tried to give up. I was broug...10. Burnaway It cant fall apart willingly. Or the end will come to soon. And surprises of the gentle kind. Will break apart my world. When its raining and crying. And everyone is unclear. The distortion of a bitte...11. Can I do What I Want? What happened to the time today?. It went by so absolutely fast. Looking at the clock progress. And looking in to my past. Robbing instincts by being alive. Life is lost in the action, man. The clock...12. Cancer The cancer is in my soul. It is burning, it is hot. The dull thud of its welcome. Proving always what im not. Like today is just like yesterday. Tomorrow is one more dream. The cancer of all my life g...13. Cold Clear Water Cold clear water. The blood turns into. Brilliant red water. A bleached pale body. Eyes closed, they do not see. Worm red water. Empty and collapsed. Warm red water. The life goes through the pulled p...14. Colour In Vision Colour in vision. Red and chinese look at me please. Blue black vision three d colour. Shot up shut down better go downtown. They dont realize theyre looking in my red eyes. Color in vision. Rain rain...15. Come and Dance With Me Inspiration by the moment. Inspiration taking hold. Surrounded by addiction. In this world you are alone. No one here can help you. Its the way its got to be. Forgetting all your worries. Come and dan...16. Completely Alone Sometimes i feel alone. When my other half fall asleep. But soon my conscience will awake. And find out im not so alone. Has there always been another. Hiding inside me somewhere?. Wanting to come out...17. Crack The Shell Oozing out little lives. Alcoholic patchwork. Disintegrating traditions. Who is weak?. Not the dreamer. But the television viewer. Looking to have their thoughts. Laid out for them. Like your clothes...18. Deliver To Me You dont see me:. Blank expressions are much better now, better now. Than expressions I want to give to you. More than I could ever feel. Will never reach your mind. Please deliver to me a better reas...19. Do You Know What It's Like? Something is hidden. Something is screaming to be let out of me. Everythings so real. Everything seems to be exactly as it should. Do you know what its like. But something is wrong. Theres always one...20. Down In The Hole I was once a man with reason. Reasons I had for wanting to live. Until my heart of gold turned to lead. And these thoughts of killing the world got into my head. Long ago I was put down in the hole. F...21. Everyone Hates Me Stepping into the point of a knife thats in my hands. Blood on my hands but what will they think if I cry?. Lay in a room where the axe falls on thoughts of me. Feeling the eyes staring at me, that di...22. Explain My World Explain the hurt and pain. Give a better reason to be here I cant find a noun. Life is not enough. Life is so unfair I found out no one really cares. Pleasure is unreal. Pleasure is the substance kill...23. Exploration What in the world is inside of me?. Or what isnt inside is a better word. The sky is so dark from the bitter inside. Its almost as thought she did this for me. Say hello to my world, come one come all...24. Feel My Love Driving down the road. Dont know where im at. Driving our earnest ninety-five. Im not feeling bad. No not so bad. Feeling less than a man. I lost everything I ever had. I really shouldnt want to kill...25. Flexible Morality Im trying to tell you a nasty story. Of all of the wrong ive done. But what could be wrong in the eyes of my soul?. How could I be so blind?. My only sin in the judging world. Is being myself doing wh...26. Genius Of The Crowd There is enough treachery, hatred, violence. Absurdity in the average human being. To supply any given army on any given day. And the best at murder are those who preach against it. And the best at ha...27. God You die you dirty little sucker. You sucked it all out of me. Picked the peynuts out of my shit. Show me hell and heaven. And all the rest of your bull-fuck. Im coming. Oh god look at me. Look at me....28. Goodbye You Shits Blessed be the lords. How take me away with cancer. With you im disease. So let me rot. Please please please. This is so stupid. I cannot breathe. Pain comes when the pleasures I need. Ive run all im...29. Grief Without Chorus I looked in my faces for the answers. Knowing I would find no answers. Inside my eyes are raining. Watering down the grief in my life. I feel my cowardly limits. Keeping me here inside. Im looking int...30. Guilty Thoughts Unclean thoughts, youll burn in hell. Guilty thoughts, youll burn in hell. Obscene thoughts, youll burn in hell. Only garbage is clean compared to this. Unclean thoughts, youll burn in hell. Obscene t...31. Happiness Happy. I break through tension by screaming help. I break through ice for me to melt. Im held at bay to say hello. The hatfull looks mean I dont know. This is happiness. To be or not. Id rather be. To...32. Hard To Face Me This is a world. Where the telephone is used to kill. There are houses. Where the wallpaper wont stand still. Ghetto king black man threatens what I got. Better give a reason. Or you better let me rot...33. Heaven and Earth I am hearing screams from inside me they hide me. Screaming, warning, telling me. Its time to come home, little one. I also hear my mind, hear the questions of my life:. Is it time?. Is this my final...34. Here We Are Your eyes are brown. My eyes are red. Seems we would be better off dead. Our life is acid. Our life is pain. Our lives are just a losing game. Here we are. Your body is warm. My soul is cold. And my s...35. I Can do No Wrong There are these lies that I told you about. And I sin like crazy when I feel im threatened. I judge everyone because theyre lower than me. I hate everyone because theyre not like me well, I can do no...36. I Cant Let Go Until its over can we sing?. This life is too short to be seen. I feel so mad but I only sigh. Waiting for the time when I will die. What is the way to be involved?. I feel I cant participate. I only...37. I Dont Even Care Im burning out like a world on fire. I thought that I was breaking all the rules. Theres such a thing called unwanted desire. Im the last one out and im a fool. How about if I go run and hide?. How ab...38. I Missed Again I just lay in a ruin. A heap of distress. What is the good part. That comes with the rest?. I just want to live. I am a living lie. When I think of your eyes. I think of the best. How did blind patien...39. I Need You One small problem stopped me from you. Its all those psychophatic-style lines you do. How am I to ever learn to play your game. When im the only one who is thinking I am sane?. I need you. Like I need...40. I Never Asked For This So when theres no more to do. Ive grown up to be that I am. A fine line between then and now. Am I really grown up now?. If theres no more to be. Be please me let me be. Cannot think my way out. So wh...41. I Really Care The secret is in slowing down time. God, why dont you just kill me?. Life was woth living in yesterdays flintstones. God, why dont you just please kill me?. I can maintain as long as I die. I stare an...42. I Wanna Be Your Dog So messed up I want you here. In my room I want you here. Now were gonna be face-to-face. And ill lay right down in my favorite place. Now I wanna be your dog. Now I wanna be your dog. Now I wanna be...43. Im So Sick There is a prison everywhere I take myself. No more losing anything I never had. Ive just begun to deal with living without recourse. And I will pay for what the power did to me. Sitting in a little r...44. It's Painful, Love Good is good and I can see you really care. Skillful in the way you twist the knife. The way you speak in that condescending way. You will always be everything you deserve. There are many reasons why...45. Just Let Go Creating the sickness wasnt difficult. If only see through my lines. You knew I would never suffer. But who held the chalice, and who had the malice?. You could never see trough the dark. Not like me...46. Just One More Thing Just one more thing. I dont need an outlet. Ive got a little puppet dancing inside of me. Just one more thing. I dont need a prophet. I always thought that living was just one of those things. Just on...47. Let Me Go Ive got it covered all the way around. Im in trouble in the other world. Every peice of litter in my frankenstein brains. Is telling me its time to give up. So I better give up. I refuse to make bad d...48. Live and Learn, Pending This is my last chance. To pre-destination. Hail to everyone. I am trying to be. The mask im wearing now. Has begun to fit so well. I really do enjoy. How ive begun to smell. Im losing my mind. In my...49. Me, Myself and I Id be lying to myself. If I told you that I cared. About anything but myself. Theres only me, myself, and I. Living cant always be easy. I see only my point of view. Why should I care?. Nothing exists...50. Moldy Where did you go when you saw me leave?. Who did you torture when you saw me on my knees?. Who became dizzy when the world stopped to spin?. Why did you lose when you know I couldnt win?. Who didnt se...51. No Means Yes Trying to believe you are who I see. People just like me are not very free. I hide away inside my little cares. Ignoring all the time your little stares. We hold a feeling somewhere deep inside. Until...52. Nobodies Fault What hapens next when theres nothing to do?. I blame myself because theres nothing you. Shaking my fist at the heavenly skies. What did I see through godly eyes?. Its nobodies fault but my own. I look...53. Nobody Complains But Me What could be better. Than losing another battle. But this time being for sure. To end up lying in the ground?. What could we better. Than never having to worry. About what has to be done next. Just t...54. Non-Person Lately I have not felt that alter-ego I know. To know my mind is slipping makes me feel so alone. And I could swear I just saw the lights of that idiot growing dim. When I approach these thoughts it f...55. Nothing But Lies Nervous as always, looking for answers. Dont know the questions, give me a reason. I cannot seem to face the fact. That there is no turning back. Someone is staring in the mirror. Cannot see past the...56. Nth Power Of Extreme Excessive until the end. The mountain is too steep to climb. But the drive is always there. Have to keep moving. Taking it to the farthest point. Breaking the limits of common sense. Way thorn in my s...57. Okay God is watching. Get on your knees, pray for cash. Kill your mother. For making you suffer, for being alive. Faith in reason. Living in a dream as bad as the nightmares. Okay. Cough your lungs out. Se...58. On a Hilltop With Gunther Floating on a hilltop shaking hands. His graps is cold and hot together. He fills my life with certain sorrow. He says my dreams are no good to anyone. Floating on a hilltop he slaps my face. He bring...59. Pain Crowling on the walls tonight im going to cry. Just a thought away my heart is pounding like love. I sense a strange figure dancing. The lights and sounds only fool me. What happend? I thought life wa...60. Playing With God Solutions come to mind. Yes I see tomorrows light. What happened before I said. I know who you are now. Lights blinking in your eyes. Tonight well both go blind. The little gods are playing in the fir...61. Poo Poo Is The Name Of My Cat Howdy-doody. Dont shoot drugs in your veins. Use your feet when you cross the street. Its so far but you really wanna die. Big cities and little towns are dirty everywhere. As dirty as flubbidub as di...62. Real Life I could never close this endless hell. The grinding teeth and the alcohol smell. Do I really want whats best for me?. The paper tastes bad but thats o. k. For me. Real life. The techno-colour psycho-...63. Redemptuous Suffering I was a slave to misfortune. The weight of my sins. Pulled at my neck. I was the only man alive. But now im much happier. Althought the weight still exists. I dont mind the distress. I have a reason t...64. Running Ive been running. For as long as. Ive been breathing air. Ive been running. To find what is possible. To douse my fires blazing in my eyes. To pull the sword. From my killing bleeding hands. The damag...65. Santa Claus Is Sick Santa claus is sick. Last night he drank too much. Its his goddamned nagging wife. Mrs. claus is a muther-humpin bitch. Oooh no! no no no no!. Ho ho ho ho!. Santa claus is sick. Last night he screwed...66. Self-Denial Refusing to go. Im not allowing myself. To make mistakes. Refusing to see. Any difference. In the before or after life. I go between. Refusing to eat. Refusing to sleep. I just might live for another...67. Self-Respect Just for you. I lay on the rack. I pick up your mess. It smells of abuse. I dont need the pressure. On my back. I do it anyhow. I do it anyhow. I do it anyhow. Just for you. Just for you. And my self-...68. Simple Distrust Its so uncommon to be understood. Energy is spent on destructive thought. But the world at large is not at fault. The difference in opinion. Between you and I. Its two different lies with the same exa...69. Stare The Child Burn it. Save it from. Pain. Some early sympathy. The ultimate gesture. Of pity. See the genius. Fall in its face. At an early age. Watch it fall. For its entire life. Dont bother with therapy. Or any...70. Stay Alive Dont dream for fear of the truth. When lies are all I can stand. How truly ashamed that I am:. Stay alive. Stay alive. Stay alive. Stay alive. Look at the stranger in the mirror. Who do I really see?....71. Subtle Akward Positions I was hoping I would go blind. So I would never see again. That we are all so wrong. About the reason we give for why we live. I was hoping I would go deaf. So I would never hear again. The reasons I...72. Take It Will you give me sometime brother?. Can you spare me a dime brother?. Is it just me or everything I see?. Its all gimme gimme gimme gimme or ill take it. How are you for seeing whats really there?. Ta...73. Terminal City Fall to the earth I cant cry. Its better than no iver never tried. Living these lies when we are all high. Comes crashing down but we never die. Expecting too soon a better life. All too soon it holds...74. The Cold Burn I want it to happen more and more. As the living collapses into lethal hunger. Its in my heart and its in my mind. Its a fatal mistake but it will burnaway. I need it to happen more and more. Like so...75. The Glory Of Pain All the twists and turns in life. Lead towards pain and a burning soul. Where is the reward for pain?. Who pays us back for all of this pain?. What is the reason for all of this pain?. Look before you...76. The Golden Calf Where did it all begin?. One mans amen, anothers sin. One sin too many for you. Another man driven to two. All allowed to believe in thought. But never given the thought. Its planted in the mind. Its...77. The Pain Is Real Questions forming little lies. Resting on a pedestal. Nothing touching high enough. Nothing touching high enough. Answers when I need them most. Tell my why you want to live. I am waiting for the word...78. The Spanker Part One Im so tired. While I crawl for existence. I never paid the price. It hurts to pay the price you pay. And while I lay in the jungle. My thoughts are permitted. Once. Now. Only now. And while they all t...79. The Story Of My Life Burn normal to abnormal parents. Exposed to cancer: carcinogen television. Exposed to god: carcinogen religion. Exposed to faith: carcinogen girlfriend. Dont ever tell me anything. Ill never need to k...80. The Sun See the sun shining way up high. Shining bright in the morning sky. Shoot me down like you like to do. See me laugh, see me cry. How can I ever compensate. For lack of hopes in my little mind?. Standi...81. The Window Of My Dreams There is a window to my dreams. Extending into the world where nobody can trespass. Where I can cry alone, naked and alone. I can dream all I cannot be, I can be what I ever could. On the other side o...82. Theatre Of Life You are so experienced you pawn it off me. I will suffer like your bad joke all over me. The red color you begins with an x. I need you but is it all just I need for me?. Lightening hairstyle, little...83. Throw Me To The Wind When my guilty tears form a pool. All I can think of is why. If there ever was a thought I had in me. Its too good to waste on this ugly fool. Id give my soul to see you die. To skirt this time define...84. Touch Me and Die I reach my hand to the sky. Touch me. Clutching at a glimpse of my dreams. Touch me. Circumsfances are unreal. Touch me. As are the feelings that I know you feel. As are the feelings that I know you f...85. Try Real Hard Why dont you try pulling apart my world?. Break it away so neat. Do what the disease could never accomplish. Amputate my brain nice and neat. Im just another fool lost in myself. Afraid of whats in he...86. Turn Off The Light Drawn out and just too scared to sleep. One day ill close my eyes and go to sleep. I just have to believe I need it first. The light of day begins in my dream. The dream is so real, is it really a dre...87. Unchained Melody Oh. My love, my darling. I've hungered for your touch, A long, lonely time. Time goes by, so slowly. And time can do so much. Are you. Still mine?. I need your love, I need your love. God speed y...88. Up and Down Do you have to be so hard to get. Especially with those emerald eyes. You might have been a neon lover. But you didnt have to advertise. Well come on, well come on. You might have been a crackshot sho...89. Useless Useless staring eyes. Its useless telling lies. Better not look out. Better not look at that fool in the mirror. Its hard to say I care. Its hard to even stare. Whats the world to think?. Whats the us...90. Violent Memories Chances, it seems. Have become too much for me to take. Lying awake. Thinking about the mistakes ive made. Wonder if I could. Ever turn back the hands of time. So I can correct. All the mistakes ive m...91. Waiting For You I dont want to be alone waiting for you. I might have to suffer for all I know. I look into the sky waiting for you. In the name of comfort its all I can do. The sun beats down on my back. While im wa...92. Waste Of Time Everyday of my life is filled with hatred and lies. When I walk down the street. I can see it in their eyes. Down into their soul. Their warships and their goals. The hopes and dreams have died. And I...93. Wednesday Night She walked through my broken door. I was drunk, sprawled out on the floor. I poured her a cheap dry white wine. When me laid back I lost my mind. It was on a wednesday night. She has eyes that make th...94. What Compelse Me? I knew I caught a glimpse of hope in my eye. But I didnt have enough guts to see it through. Just when I thought there was finally something to die for. I couldnt find enough chains to hold me down. I...95. White Light Sometimes the thought of your death makes me cry. Im always bringing up your name but I dont know why. You never did me wrong you never did me right. But sometimes when we suffered together. I thought...96. Who Is The Blame? Power is gone. But nothing can last. Who is to blame. Im running too slow. You are running too fast. Who is to blame. The once-in-awhiles. Are nerver undone. Who is to blame. I felt your pity. Cause i...97. X-Mas Time Again I was lost. I was found. I was smothered. I was drowned. I became a simple man. A hopeless life without a plan. Look at me everyone. Now im like all of you. No new plans, go to work. Shut your mouth y...98. X-Ray House You hide in the drawings. Youve scribbled on the wall. You cannot see it anywhere. Because you cant stand tall. Your confidence is failing. It never did before. The more you sit in your x-ray house. I...99. You Cant Hold Me Down I cannot begin to see the future. Bright as the light of my mind may be. Spending my hopes on a channel changer. Wasting my life on a fucking tv. If I begin to see that filthy soul. By looking myself...100. You Hurt Me I travel a lot. But just in my head. Where do you think I go?. T thought I said. Tomorrow ill be leaving. Tomorrow if I can. You think im escaping. Well, I will if I can. I thought I could take it. Th...